It is September 2019 and I have decided to revive my blog.  I'm using the same one, though this is the first post in over a year. I still like the idea of talking about ways we are or can be consciously connected spiritually. This is what I wrote some years ago about why I want to do this blog and it is still true now:

I believe the real point of connection for us all is through our hearts. So I plan to share what comes from my heart and it is my hope that readers will join me and share what comes from your heart about the things we experience which connect us, our commonalities and our appreciation for sharing the world we live in with each other.

If you would like to read other blogs I have written over the last ten years, here's a link:


It has been my view since before Trump was elected that the reason many people were voting for him was because he vowed to appoint supreme court justices who would overturn Roe v. Wade and set the stage for a total ban on abortions, on women’s reproductive choice, our rights and our freedoms. I could never watch the Handmaids Tale because it was too creepy and disturbing, but we are looking straight down the barrel of that gun right now. The supreme court might well recognize that they have made the worst decision of their lives as it relates to American freedom. Those who support this decision have no idea what they have brought upon America, setting women’s hard fought for fundamental rights back 50 years.

The Conservatives on this Supreme court made this ruling despite the broad American support for abortion/reproductive rights:
Gallup polls show Americans’ support for abortion in all or most cases at 80% in May 2021, slightly higher than in 1975 (76%).

Those of us who believe in Democracy, the constitution and the right of all citizens to make our own decisions about reproduction are understandably disturbed and irate that this conservative court can unilaterally decide on a 50-year-old previous ruling, in direct opposition to our basic rights and our majority view as Americans.


Relevant articles regarding religion and abortion

From the National Institute of Health:

Biblical views on abortion: an Episcopal perspective 1985
…the biblical portrait of a person is that of a complex, many-sided creature with the god-like ability and responsibility to make choices. The fetus does not meet those criteria. When considering the issue of abortion, the one who unquestionably fits this portrait of personhood is the pregnant woman.

Abortion: a guide to making ethical choices 1983
…The Catholic Church, when considered in its diversity, teaches that some abortions can be moral; the conscience of a person is the final arbiter of any abortion decision. Conscience is humans' progressively refined ability to think about situations and evaluate their moral goodness/badness. With respect to abortion, this means that a woman should make the choice that seems best to her. … Having an abortion, giving birth, and use of contraceptives when no children are wanted, are responses to which a woman is entitled. Her choice is moral when based on responsible and conscious decisions and actions.


From Time Magazine 2014, 6 Myths About Abortion:     

1. The Bible forbids abortion.
It shouldn’t matter what the Bible says about abortion. The United States is not a theocracy. Still, given the certitude of abortion opponents that abortion violates God’s Word, it might come as a surprise that neither the Old Testament nor the New mentions abortion—not one word.

The New Testament was a second chance for God to make himself clear about abortion. Jesus had some strong views of marriage and sex… But he said nothing about abortion. Neither did Saint Paul, or the other New Testament authors, or any of the later authors whose words were interpolated into the original texts.

I recommend reading the whole 6 Myths Time Magazine article:

With this court also overturning the New York gun law, which has been a law since 1911 (and paving the way more gun safety laws to be removed), they have made it even easier to carry concealed weapons and have made it likely that there will be yet another upsurge of terrorist attacks on abortion clinics that still do exist, and anyone associated with them. Not to mention the increase in mass shootings we are already seeing in our country against innocent Americans just living our lives.

The conservatives on this supreme court seem bent on making our America a more dangerous place to live, be it from removing our ability to make our own reproductive choices, to making it easier for terrorist attacks from hateful people to murder those whose color they don’t like or those whose opinions they don’t agree with.

Is this really the country we want for ourselves and all who come after us, or do we care so little for our lives now, for the coming generations, for safety and for freedom?

Please vote for honest people of integrity who truly care about our fundamental rights.




America's Strength

I want to address the idea that Trump is protecting American rights. I will say out right that this is not my perspective. For those who support him because you do think this, I ask you to consider the following:

Think for even a moment about all the Americans (and there are so many) who have never had access to what you consider to be your American rights. Think about all those who have never had access to a fair wage for their hard work. Think about all those who have never received equal treatment under the law. Think about all those who have never had equal opportunity or access to lift themselves and their families out of poverty.

Think about all your fellow Americans who have lived in fear of brutal treatment and death from police, not only for themselves and their families, but whose ancestors throughout American history have also lived with this fear. Think about all those who worked so very hard in the hope that their children will have a better life, whose ancestors helped build the America you cherish. Think about all those who have lived their lives in fear that a uniformed servant of their community could take everything away because they don’t like the color of your skin or who you love.

The American rights that you want preserved for you, throughout our American history have been institutionally withheld from a great number of your fellow Americans and it is in your best interest that you very much care about this. Please consider the great divide among all Americans that has been magnified under the slogan and current policies of this “Make America Great Again” administration.

This divisiveness is truly making America weak. There is no strength in keeping privileges for yourself that are not available to all Americans. There is no strength in hating your neighbor or those in the next town or next state because you don’t agree with them. There is no strength for our country, in either fearing or hating the fact that the United States is and always will be comprised of many different colors, cultures and religions. There is no strength in wanting to go backwards or wanting American rights and privileges only for yourself and those you agree with.

So I am saying GROW A PAIR, (breasts or balls, whatever you are inclined toward). Stop being so afraid of what you think you might lose and start caring about what you gain when all Americans share the same freedoms, rights and opportunities. Start caring about what you gain when all Americans have the same opportunity for education, safety, and equitable pay. Be willing to share the great resources in the United States which can and should be available to all equally. Be willing to talk with those who might seem different than you for whatever reason and be willing to expand your perception and experience of what our country, in all her diversity has to offer.

Our America is only as great as our belief in equality and equal access to opportunity, equal justice, equal education, health care, safety and freedom for all. This the foundation and premise our country was founded on and as Americans this is where we will find our best future.

Love Thy Enemy, Love Thy Neighbor

I hesitated to use this title because I think there is misunderstanding about the meaning of these ideas. I certainly did not understand them when I was a child going to the Baptist church with my mother. I’m not saying that I have enemies, but there are certainly those I disagree with, politically, morally and ethically. Admittedly, I have been known to judgmentally engage in disagreements.

I have over recent years come to appreciate the far reaching merits of loving those we don’t understand or agree with. I have come to appreciate that love is a far more powerful agent of change than anger and hatred. There are a few different things at play here, which I believe to be true and the understanding of, has changed how I choose to be and to interact in this life.

#1)    What we focus on is reflected back to us. What we think about and more importantly, what we feel, boomerangs right back to us.

#2)    Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting change.

#3)    Imagination is everything.

#4)    Love is the Supreme Power of our Universe.

Our greatest leaders for freedom, equality and change have understood these things. Our greatest leaders were visionaries. They knew not only what was not right, they knew what our world could be, and imagined what our lives would look like when we all have equal access to resources, freedom, education and economic and social justice. They knew we had to do things differently.

Many of us feel in our hearts what is morally, ethically and humanely wrong in our society. But let’s not just be mad. Let’s not just be on the streets yelling at the government. Let’s take this awareness forward into the realm of conscious change from where ever we are and give our creative focus to what our lives can be. Let’s imagine, value and expect freedom and justice in every corner of our world, for every being. And let’s love this idea. Let’s feel the love in our hearts as we imagine that everyone has what they need, not only to live, but to thrive. Not just in our state or our country, but for this whole planet we all live on together.

There is so much momentum right now for change and for evolution that embraces the well being of all. There is not only momentum, but many of us have time to pause and create these visions of change, visions which can lift our hearts and our passion and to ignite the loving energy we need to meet the overt hatred of racist attacks and pervasive bullying in those who cling to selfish patriarchal, economic and political power, real or imagined.

Our anger and frustration with the current and historical systemic inequities, racially, economically and ecologically, have brought people out once again to make changes. Again we find ourselves at the crossroads of knowing we can no longer stand idly by and let our neighbors experience racial, economic and social injustice and brutality. Nor can we stand by and let all the natural resources of our planet be contaminated by individual and corporate laziness and greed. We are in a time when standing together and saying no to the status quo is absolutely the right thing to do. We are in a time when a renaissance of creative solutions is ready spring forth from our imaginations and passion, to open up so much potential for our future.

Whether we are out on the streets or home talking with our family and friends or whether we are on social media, are writing to our congressional representatives and getting out to vote or voting by mail from home (yes, let’s be visionary about this too), I am suggesting we do it with the deeply powerful love in our hearts for our future. I am suggesting using our potent imaginations to envision a world that supports all equally, compassionately and fairly. And let’s share those visions with each other and keep the momentum going.



So I had this interesting experience during physical therapy today. My young, very thoughtful and knowledgeable physical therapist told me to hold myself as if I were a queen. Next she said, “You are a queen”. Considering myself to be a Butchlight lesbian, she caught me off guard. Queen, I thought, no, it would be King. But then I realized, no, Kings suck. They are arrogant and controlling dictatorial tyrants. Well, if any of the fairy tales are true, some of them might be nice and ethical.

But back to the idea of me feeling like a queen, that did take some time for me to wrap my head around. The idea does have merit and did create some really good feelings within me once I let go of my Butchlight self concept. I mentally switched gears, which in turn changed my emotional state and my energetic experience. My physical therapist wanted me to upgrade my stature, which would improve my posture and it worked, because I understood what she meant by a queenly stature. I have lived with and been friends with many queens. I’ve known mostly lesbian queens, but also straight queens. Many mothers are queens, by the very nature of their love and protection of their children.

For me in this particular circumstance, with my physical therapist wanting me to alter how I carried my body, I recalled the stance and stature of the femmes in my life. They have been strong, very smart, confident, and articulate. The queens stand (or sit) upright and no matter what their height, they are the tallest in the room. I at times was frustrated about this in Barrie, because she already had what I was trying so hard to get a hold of and integrate into my being. It did turn out to be a good point of reference and goal image for me, because I have been blessed to have many queens in my life and I think you all know who you are, be you friends, family, acquaintances or more.

I then sat upright and emulated the energetic quality of a queen and even though it felt a bit awkward in this older Butchlight mind and body. I was able, through the example of the many wonderful and amazing queens I have known, to sit tall, feel regal and even feel deserving of respect, reverence and love. These feelings have been challenging for me, not just because of my somewhat sexist conditioning, but also from a real lack of confidence. Who knows where all this started in me, the point now is, I understood. I understood because I have been blessed to have amazing, talented, confident and wise women in my life who by their essence showed me how to carry myself like a queen. I thank you all for being who you naturally are and showing me the way.



I just wanted to take a moment to acknowledge and appreciate all the good things that have happened as a result of the virus. We are hit with hard and devastating news all the time, but I have been inspired by John Krazinski’s “Some Good News” YouTube show. I know there are many things I don’t know about because I have a limited attention span for scrolling through Facebook and I have cut back on my news time. But I feel it’s worth noting how the human spirit has risen to the challenges we have been facing in so many ways. We have also been shown the benefits to the health and wellbeing of our planet when we slow down as our air quality has improved significantly without all the pollution from cars and planes. Our oceans and waterways have improved as well. The people of Venice have clear canals and can see the fish and Dolphins and more importantly in my mind the sea life can see each other and live in clear waters.

Car manufacturers retooled their plants to make the much needed ventilators. Citizens and businesses are making masks for healthcare workers. Distilleries are making sanitizer and some are giving it away. Restaurants are giving sack lunches to those who need help and for frontline hospital staff. Newspaper deliverers are now delivering groceries at no charge to people who can’t go out. Fire departments are delivering medications to people who can’t get to pharmacies. The government is giving money to people and businesses to help us. More shelters have been created for homeless. Temporary hospitals were created when the others were full. The entertainment industry found ways to produce content from their homes. Police officers read stories online to kids stuck at home. Schools gave out laptops to kids who didn’t have them and classes started being held online. Some of the wealthiest people on the planet have given hundreds of millions to help people and to fund research for virus treatments, testing and immunization. Churches are live streaming their services.  AA meetings are being live streamed for members. Doctors and Therapists offered phone/video appointments. Food Banks are trying to work with farmers to save some of the crops that have not been able to be harvested or sold and give to the massive amount of people going to Food Banks. There are so many people doing amazing and wonderful things to help not only the people in their lives, but also total strangers. We are seeing amazing kindness,  generosity and creativity and I am so grateful to see that spirit rise up.


I have wanted to write another blog for a while, but I have been overwhelmed with what to talk about. There is so much right now and we are all negotiating through it the best we can. I have withdrawn somewhat from social media, which for me is Facebook, because I have not wanted to contribute to the anxiety, fear and frustration we have all experienced in varying degrees and I have not felt the creativity of those who have put up both inspiring and witty posts and videos. Last night, partly inspired by a very funny video that was messaged to me from a friend and also inspired by my lengthening hair, I wrote this:

I have been wanting, but hesitant, to put up a photo of myself because my hair has grown longer than it’s been in years and I feel like I look quite different now, which I’m not sure is all that good. But I kind of like it, maybe because it is different. Or maybe because it is who I am right now.

It might not seem like a big deal, but let’s be real…Hair is totally a really big deal. Millions are spent on hair, or more importantly, our image we choose to maintain of ourselves. I do not mean to say there is anything wrong with maintaining good hair, hair that represents you and how you want to look.  I’ve even worried about how my dog looks and feels with her hair so long. Everyone from my friend Jack to Pink are taking scissors to their hair (they admit, not well) in an effort to get back to who they have been or imagine themselves to be. I kind of like feeling different in this long hair.  Though, truth be told, I have had varying responses from friends.

What I also like is the feeling of accepting who I am as I look right now. Our self image, a big part of which can be our hair, can be totally undone by not being able to maintain ourselves the way we are use too. There is so much going on right now that has undone our ability to maintain ourselves the way we are use to. I found over the years through spiritual teachings and a lot of practice, that accepting what is does make being human and living through challenges a little easier. And it gives some breathing room to assess what is truly important to give our attention to. In this pause it’s possible to look toward and create what we want our future to be.

So I have accepted (mostly) this new look and I am coming out with what may be good or bad hair, but it is hair that is. I am choosing during this very challenging and heart wrenching time to accept my hair and my image as it is and to take the time that could preoccupy my thoughts with my hair and image not being right or what I want it to be, and put thoughts toward creating a future which is happy, healthy and prosperous for us all. That does include for me looking good, but those who know me, know I’ve always needed a little help with that. So I am finally sharing this new look, though, I did have to take a lot of selfies to get one I felt looked acceptable.

long hair for web

Rise Up!

I have been thinking about this for a while, that when I was younger there was a lot of music that supported those of us who were working for change. We had anthems that invigorated us and supported us and gave us the spirit and inspiration to stand up for what we believed in, for what we knew in our hearts was right and to reject what we knew in our hearts was wrong, abusive, inappropriate, unjust or corrupt. At that time we fought for freedom from war, for women’s rights to be athletes or leaders in any capacity, for reproductive rights, for equal pay, for freedom from Nuclear mishaps, for just and respectful treatment of our indigenous communities and for freedom to just be who we wanted to be without traditional conservative limitations on our lives.

So I started feeling like I needed an anthem and maybe we all need anthems about now, when there is so much craziness going on around us: our global climate crisis, our President abusing the power of his office and so many signing off on his lying and lack of integrity, domestic terrorism and hateful attacks on our own citizens, countries and leaders who are attacking, torturing and killing their own people or neighboring countries, with so many animals on the verge of extinction, monstrously large floating fields of plastic in the oceans and micro-plastics in our sea life, because we don’t even have a national recycling program to handle our own waste, our own country splitting up families, putting children and adults in prisons and warehouses, detaining and mistreating people who just want a better life, a safe life.

It can be both overwhelming and depressing for us to give our attention to all the issues that need our attention. If we are to continue and even thrive on this planet, we need things to energize us, lift our spirits and inspire us to stand up for what we believe and to speak out against what we know is wrong. The song Rise Up from the 80’s came to my mind and it took me a while to figure out who performed it. It was the Parachute Club with Lorraine Segato. I’m posting YouTube’s of the original version and the Anniversary version from The New Parachute Collective, including Lorraine Segato. I have also including the lyrics below the videos.

Please share these with others who might like some inspiration and share your anthems that inspire you to Rise Up.


Rise Up - New Parachute Collective (Anniversary Version) Lorraine Segato

Oh rise and show your power
(Rise up rise up) We're dancing into the sun
(Rise up rise up) It's time for celebration
(Rise up rise up) Spirits time has come

We want lovin' we want laughter again
We want heartbeat
We want madness to end, we want dancin'
We want to run in the streets
We want freedom to live in this peace
We want power, we want to make it okay
Want to be singin' at the end of the day
Children to breathe a new life
We want freedom to love who we please

Oh rise and show your power
(Rise up rise up) Everybody is dancing into the sun
(Rise up rise up) It's time for celebration
(Rise up rise up) Spirits time has come

Talkin' 'bout the right time to be workin' for peace
Wantin' all the tension in the world to ease
We wantin' love while walking on the streets
We want to be free, we want that be free

Talking about a new way
Talking about changes and names
Talking about building the land of our dreams
His tightrope's gotta learn how to bend
We're makin' new plans
We're gonna start it again

Oh rise and show your power
(Rise up rise up) Everybody is dancing into the sun
(Rise up rise up) It's time for celebration
(Rise up rise up) Spirits time has come

Rise up now

It's time, it's time, it's time

Oh rise and show your power
(Rise up rise up) We're dancing into the sun
(Rise up rise up) It's time for celebration
(Rise up rise up) Everybody's time has come
Spirits time has come
Spirits time has come

Oh rise and show your power
(Rise up rise up) We're dancing into the sun
(Rise up rise up) It's time for celebration
(Rise up rise up) Spirits time has come
Willing time has come
Spirits time has come

Time for you and me



Returning Home

My dearest and most beloved friend, I love you so much, so deeply. I feel great sadness at the thought of never hearing your voice again, of never sitting across from you and sharing our feelings about those we care about, and our thoughts and beliefs about the true nature of this world and the invisible world of our souls. I know it is your path to move on ahead and actually experience the things we have pondered over these many years. You have returned home to that heavenly realm from which we all arise and I am grateful for your freedom from the suffering you have had to endure these last years. I am grateful also for your freedom to explore your new life in spirit and to visit any of us who love you so much and who you love so much, where ever we are, whenever you want.

I know it was very hard for you to leave us, even while wanting the suffering to end. I don’t know that any of us who remain will ever understand the purpose or need of suffering in order to leave our physical life. It is my belief that even though it feels to us like you have had to leave this life too early, that there is purpose in this timing. I believe this is of your souls choosing and that you will have great happiness in being able to continue on your life’s work of creatively expressing your conscious evolution and loving kindness for all of us whose lives and hearts you have lit up and inspired. Even though we are heartbroken about all the pain you endured and we feel deep sadness not to have you physically here with us, I know it has been your destiny and I am grateful to know that you will be there waiting for us when it is our turn.

I am also grateful to believe that you will be in touch in some way and that you will help me to make that connection with you. I think you will be helping us all as we struggle to continue without you in this life. I believe I will feel the presence of your very loving spirit and I look forward to hearing all about our spiritual home to which you have returned and to learn about your adventures in consciousness from your new perspective.

Your friend, eternally...


Because of you...

I recently drove back home to Southern Oregon to visit my oldest and dearest friend who has been living with cancer. I knew it would probably be our last visit and it was so hard to leave her. She was heavily medicated and struggling, her eyes closed most of the time. On the third day as I was getting ready to leave, she opened her eyes wide and looked right at me and kissed me several times, and we told each other how much we loved each other. I told her not to be afraid, that she would be happy, she would be healthy again and could do whatever she wanted and wouldn’t have to wait for the things she wants to happen the way we do here. I told her that her animals would all be waiting for her and she smiled. I told her I would write to her the way I write to Barrie and she nodded her head. The following is a letter I wrote to her in my journal the next morning. She passed a few days later, early this morning, Sunday October 13, 2019.

My dearest friend, when I was 10 and the new kid in school, when we moved to Eagle Point in the middle of the school year, you scooped me up and brought me into your world. You became my best friend from that point and all through Junior High and High School. Over these 54 years, there were times when we were living in different towns and different states and not always in touch, but each time we reconnected, our friendship and love for each other remained steadfast.

About 15 years ago you scooped me up again and brought me into your spiritual world. You brought me back to beliefs and philosophies I had abandoned. You literally lit up my life with renewed hope and purpose. The books you shared with me gave me a foundation and ignited my curiosity to pursue greater happiness and to develop my knowledge and awareness of a spiritual way of living. It led me to learn about methods of emotional healing which I believe saved my life and my relationship with Barrie, because I had shut down emotionally after my mother’s death some years before. It helped me to heal from childhood challenges, from my fathers early death, from my mothers and from other family deaths. This spiritual foundation and your love and friendship helped carry me through Barrie’s illness and passing. At times you were the only one I could talk with about spiritual ideas and we shared so much over these years. We shared books we would find in used bookstores, we shared our writings, and we had great discussions trying to gain better understanding about what we were reading and learning and the deeper truths of our being.

My friend, you have been and will always be in my heart a deep abiding love, and because of you, I know you have gone from this Earth into the welcoming light of all the angels who surround you with the love and the light of our Divine Spirit. All the love you have given to your family, friends and even strangers throughout this life is pouring back over you now and you are knowing greater love than we can ever imagine. You are experiencing the glorious infinite loving nature of God and I know it will be your great happiness to share that with us. Because of you I know your love, your great light and your spiritual presence will surround us and you will be our angel of light, touching our souls with the depth of your love.
Your friend, eternally…


Our Most Important Relationship

When I went to the recent Climate Strike Rally in Portland, Oregon one of the speakers spoke about realizing that the earth is the most important thing he could give his time and energy to because it is our home. He said the earth is the foundation upon which everything else is built and the key to our survival. I couldn’t agree more that we all need to take Global Warming and the Climate Crisis seriously and do whatever we can in our individual lives to cut dangerous emissions, waste and the single use plastic which is polluting our land and our oceans. We also need to let our law makers know they need to take these things seriously and we need to quit supporting companies that pollute. Our relationship with earth, our home, is so very important and treating her with care, honor, respect and love is the least we can do to protect her and the future of civilization.

I take the idea of our most important relationship a little deeper though. I feel that the real foundation upon which all life rests is our spirit. Within us is the Divine Source and Substance, which has many names including God, and which is the ultimate Intelligence of life. Our most important relationship is with that Divine Intelligence which organized the earth and all life upon her. It is this Intelligence which drew from the Divine Substances of light and love to form humanity, the stars and the heavens and all that is known and unknown to us.

This is what I have been giving my attention to and from this perspective I am re-establishing within an awareness which is not new, which most indigenous societies have brought forward from ancient times. It is the awareness of how sacred our earth is and how sacred ALL Life is, and how important it is to honor her, especially now when there are very really attacks taking place against earth and all who live here.

There are business people spending hundreds of millions of dollars along with people in our government who are actively working to hide the truth and the science which prove the very real crisis that threatens the earth, our quality of life and the future of our existence. Our opportunity to reverse this activity, as well as the increasing hatred and violence we are witnessing and experiencing, lies in our waking up from the materialistic consciousness that we have all been taught by both well meaning people and by those people and companies who only have a materialistic focus and see only profit margins as the goal of living.

It is well past time for us to remember the spirit we were each born with, that Divine Substance we all have within us. It is time for us to wake up and remember our most important relationship is with that Divine Intelligence that organized all that is good in our world and the earth which is our home.

This isn’t so hard to do and it isn’t so much a mental activity, but an activity of the heart. Science has recognized what has also been known for thousands of years, that our hearts are also a brain and a far more powerful brain than what is in our head. It is as simple as opening our hearts. Our hearts know what truth is. Our hearts hold compassion, love and gratitude and when we even think to ourselves, “I will open my heart”, we feel better, we care more about those in need, we feel more like sharing what we have. It is so very important that we spend even a little time in every day opening our hearts and caring about each other and the earth, our home.

From this foundation, this spirit that is so visible in young Greta Thunberg and all the young people asking us to wake up and support their future, we will be able to have a future which is good for all. It is from this foundation that our lives can be whole and fulfilling. It is the strength, wisdom and power of our hearts which will enable us to move the mountains of resistance created by those who are endangering life and our future and who are trying to keep us blind to their devastation of our lands, our wildlife, our oceans and the very air we breathe.



Post a comment